Day 120: random thoughts

Getting back on the wagon seems to be harder than getting on it to begin with :-/

Also-I know I have talked a few times about wanting to lose a certain amount of weight or  be a specific dress size. But honestly, I will start to be more comfortable when I don't feel the need to suck in my stomach in public. That would be nice. I am okay (only okay---not satisfied) with my frontal shape (does that make sense?)...Like so:

But I absolutely abhor my profile body shot. Ladies, having a pooch/stomach is not as bad as it is pre-baby as it is post-baby. Especially post-c-section-baby.  I feel like it is so misshapen. Ugh. I really really need to find that wagon and jump back on.

I also wanted to remind you all of  a blog I posted in March I believe...It was called "what a difference"...I posted a pic of me (Here it is) and talked about what a difference make up can make in your self esteem. It can make you feel brighter and happier (at least it does to me!) Well I just wanted to add on to that, I recently started selling Mary Kay and all the make up featured in that pic is Mary Kay! (Here it is again, you know you wanna click on it!) If you are interested in purchasing Mary Kay, visit my website: Lizzy's Mary Kay website
Or contact me via post! I would love to be able to supplement my income and be my own boss! Feel free to share it with people you know! Thanks!

-with much hope and a lot of prayer

Lizzy
*Sexy or Bust* 

Day 114: Living in the Shadows

Hannah from the BL once said, "I'm living in the shadows of my life." Its sad to say, but I am sure anyone who has felt uncomfortable in their own skin has felt like this. Your life is passing you by and you feel like you are just in the audience watching it all happen. If we want to be cast the leading role in our life, there is only one way to do it! And that means you have to tryout! Give it all you got! Make TIME! We are all given the same amount of time each day: 24 hours. It is up to us to use them wisely. I for one have been slack on my 24 hours. I find laying down watching TV after work is so relaxing but at the same time, when I head to bed I think, "what a waste!" I realize all the things I can do after the fact.
Training my mindset has proven to be the hardest part of this whole journey. I find it easy to let myself slip right into a funk. And then getting out of the funk is even more difficult. When I watch the Biggest Loser, I instantly feel motivated! In 19 weeks the contestants have lost upwards of 100lbs. Now I know they have had trainers at their disposable and healthy food options readily available, but I definitely get inspired! I need to keep my focus and keep my blog going. I need to stand up more to temptation instead of giving in to it. I need to find a way to make my 24 hrs that I am given each day count.

You can have all the money in the world, but you can never buy another hour...What are you gonna do with your 24 hours?

-with much hope and a lot of prayer

Lizzy
*Sexy or Bust*

Day 109: Curves

“Cultivate your curves--they may be dangerous but they won't be avoided.”

--Mae West

Cultivate my curves, eh? I plan to do just that. I want to thin out and tone my body in all the right places. I want to leave the parts that are meant to be plump, uh...plump. Ha!  I am fortunate to have curves, not every woman does. I just happen to have a little extra...tee hee hee. Now? I just need to focus and work hard.

I have to admit it has been tough lately. I found out on Monday that the contract my employer has with VzW is ending in a few months. That means I need to start the job search asap. I do not want to be without a job come August. I learned I am definitely a stress eater. I have been snacking a lot this week since I heard.  I am trying my best to control it. Its more of an absent minded thing, and I only realize it afterward. 

But, I have faith that God will place me in the right job, whether it be actually for VzW or some other company. I do have to place a hold on my baby making plans. I know, I know, all in God's perfect timing. However I do not want to be foolish about it. I do not want to be pregnant, and then here comes August and I am jobless. For who wants to hire a preggo? 

Oh well! More time to focus on my weight loss right? Exactly! And remember: 'Curve-- the loveliest distance between two points" (Mae West)

-with much hope and a lot of prayer

Lizzy

*Sexy or Bust*

105: Habits

What is harder to do? Break old habits or form new ones? I thought I had formed a new habit with this blog, but after a few days away it became more difficult to remember. Each passing day that I didn't blog, I didn't even thing about blogging. I really want this to be a habit and one I stick too. 

I also finally did groceries! Target has Smart Ones on sale $1.79 a piece...and if you buy 10 you get a $5 gift card! Weeeeeee! Got to love that deal. I haven't taken a Smart One to work in quiet a while--and it was because I had yet to buy some. No more excuses! In the morning I am going to Curves after dropping Bella off at daycare. I work at 11, so I have plenty of time to squeeze in a workout.

After all the advice I received last night, I believe I know what I want to do! Have a baby!!!! :)
Also, I plan on going full speed with my WW and Curves. Because honestly, we do not know how long it will take to conceive. I am going to get my body back into the swing of losing weight and eating right, that way while we try to get preggo I can tone and shape my body. If my body is used to the workouts and eating healthy then I have no excuse not to continue! Like one of my friends said "why not have the best of both worlds!"

Thanks for listening! I'm baaaaaack!

-with much hope and a lot of prayer

Lizzy
*Sexy or Bust*

Day 104: In the Middle

I am stuck in the middle of 2 things I want.
1) to continue to lose weight and get in shape
2) to have baby #2 (and I mean like get preggo soon)

I know I still have time to have a baby, but I have baby fever! My husby is on board and my 3 year old is asking for a "brover baby" (baby brother.) And in a month I will be 28. Which is still young but closer to my 30s. I know that I cannot chose the gender of my future and unborn children...but if I were to wait a couple of years and end up with a girl...then I will have to try at least 1 more time for a boy. This would put me in my 30s (which again is not old) however I know the further you get in age, the hard conception can be. (or complications can arise).

On the other hand, I really do want to shed these pounds, and soon. I want to be able to be thin and healthy and feel good about myself. My weight loss hasn't been the best this past month or so as I have let a lot get in the way. I definitely need to get to the grocery store and get my healthy foods. I also need to hit Curves hard! My motivation has been lacking lately but at the same time I still yearn more than ever to be thin!

I explained to a few coworkers about why I couldn't eat Noodle & Co or Chipotle with them. I showed them my blog. I think they were blown away with my before pics. They said I was pretty now but I could tell my before pics surprised them. It really made me feel more motivated!

So readers, I realize the have a baby now/later debate is only one that I can decide...but what say you?

PS if no baby should I get a doggie?

-with much hope and a lot of prayer

Lizzy
*Sexy or Bust*

Day 100: Where have I been?

Apparently I fell off the wagon and it drove away before I could catch it...Sigh.

I am slowly catching up. After a great weekend home and a bunch of excuses before that--I have completely gone astray. I want to say I met my 4 week challenge but that would be a lie. I want to make a new one (my bday is in a month!) but now I am worried that making a challenge for myself is going to make it worse....

What to do?

-with much hope and a lot of prayer

Lizzy
*Sexy or Bust*

Day 88: Round is a shape!

So one of the managers at work is from Africa (not sure what part but she has a lovely accent!), and today as I was getting ready to leave she complimented me. She was telling me that she thinks I dress nice and that "round" women don't normally dress well. I didn't take offense to this (normally I probably would have) because I realized she really was being genuine. She meant that the way I dressed flattered my size. She is not new to the store but has been away on leave for a while so she doesn't really know my WW journey and efforts. Anyway I found it to be funny and thought I would share!

Also--I signed up officially for Curves today--NO MORE EXCUSES!!! And to top it off, the instructor said I can bring Bella if I am ever in a jam. So seriously no excuses!

AND today is my 8 month-iversary! LOL I can't believe 8 months has passed since we said "I do!"

-with much hope and a lot of prayer

Lizzy
*Sexy or Bust*