Ever been stuck? Physically or Mentally? That is how I think I have been living my life for the past few years. Stuck. In the past. You know what I mean? No? Let me explain. For the past 10 years I have slowly had my weight creep up on me. But I still look to who I was 10 years ago and think its who I want to be or rather who I should be. 10 years ago I was a high school senior, ready to graduate and head to Furman. I was pretty smart and had a promising future. And of course, like I mentioned in one of my first blogs, life took a different route.
Anyways, in the back of my mind I still think of who I was back then, and for a long time I couldn't help but wish I could be that girl again. I wanted that brain, that future, that body I had in 2001. But here lately, I realize that if I had those things back, I would have to take all the bad that went with my life back then. And give back all the good that has come from it (i.e. my husby and daughter).
I never figured that I would stay so stuck in the past that 10 years would go by before I knew it. Well, I have made the decision to get myself unstuck. I do not want to compare who I am today with who I was, and wish I could be that girl again. Although that girl was smart, with a promising future, and a great body, she was also naive, shy, and barely able to do anything for herself. Now? Yes I am struggling with my self image, but I know who I am. I am a proud mother, and happy newlywed, and a survivor. I have been through rough patches and come out strong. I can still be naive (more like gullible and/or trusting), but I have definitely developed a "B.S. radar".
From now on, I am going to focus on my present and let that lead to my future. I am going to take things one day at a time and be proud of the woman I am. And that includes what I look like. I know that according to most people, it is impossible to get back to your high school weight. So, I am not looking to do that. I just want to be healthy and happy. And create a new me. So I can look back fondly at who I was, and where I have been, but love where I am.
Are you stuck?
-with much hope and a lot of prayer
Lizzy
*Sexy or Bust*
Join me on my weight loss journey! This is going to be a very real attempt at losing weight without using a "fast" method. Why? Been there, done that, gained more.
wow this is good and your attitude is great ,cause why worry for the past ,its done and it can't be change ,and you do have two special people in your life now ,and your life has changed for the better ,only God knows why your life turned out like this ,but i can say you are happier now ,and as for the wight that is one thing you can change and yes your health is important .so keep it up .love ya .
ReplyDeleteFabulous!
ReplyDeleteLiving in the past will get us nowhere fast. Yay to you for changing that! :)
Wow!! I love what you are doing, you are a great writer as well. I am trying the weight loss thing as well but nothing fast thats unhealthy. I look forward to reading more about your journey!
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