I talked with the husby and I am going to go to Curves for a free week and see if it is what I want to do. I like free! I can't wait.
Also...my pants are loose! wahooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. Pants I recently bought for work. It felt great putting them on and feeling room in them.
On a side note. Do you ever feel like people do not know the real you? That they only know the fat you? I mean, I feel so guarded when I meet people. I want to be calm, poised, and reserved. I want to seem sophisticated. I do not want to be my silly self. My crazy, laugh out loud self. Why? Because of my mindset. I do not want to be the crazy fat girl. Or that wild big girl.
I feel like this all the time. Work, meeting new people, hanging out with my husby's friends. I do not feel like they know me.And that all they see is the plus size me. There are only a handful of people that I can seriously hang out with and not feel like I am being judged. And honestly, there are probably plenty of people not judging me, but in my mind I think they are. And I can't let my guard down.
Anyways, I long for my weight to peal off, as well as the layers that guard me. I want to be confident when I meet people and feel like I belong.
Tell me I am not crazy, and that some of you all feel that way from time to time...
-with much hope and a lot of prayer
Lizzy
*Sexy or Bust*
Join me on my weight loss journey! This is going to be a very real attempt at losing weight without using a "fast" method. Why? Been there, done that, gained more.
Yep!! I feel ya, you are certainly not crazy. I think lots of people (thinner and bigger) feel this way to be honest.
ReplyDeleteBut just be yourself. I happen to like you just the way you are and I think everyone would agree! :P
Hey, Poke...you are one of the ones in my handful!
ReplyDeleteGood luck on your work out! Hopefully if you join and u know u are paying for it that will be encourgment in itself to go.
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